Ana Lucia
by CeeJay0420
Summary: The life of Ana Lucia before CBP. JackAna, maybe WillElizabeth, I don't know. Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Pirates of the Carribean or Disney or anything like that. Can't

My name is Cassandra Swann. Or Casey, if you want to call me by what I really want to be called. Or, if you're one of my servants, you shall address me as "Miss Cassandra" or your head is off. Yes, I said servants. What, don't believe me? C'mon. I guess you won't believe me either when I say I'm the governor's daughter. The pirates didn't believe it. What the frick are you doing with that straight jacket?!? I swear I'm not loony, or on drugs, or drinking too much. I don't have a history of lunacy or otherwise. There were pirates, and this whole story is true. I rest my case.

This story started on a really hot day in August. And when I say it was really hot, it's be like saying that the Titanic had a small problem with icebergs (though back then, we didn't know it yet). I had to wear this three layered, long sleeve dress with nothing to shade me but a hat. Don't get me wrong, the dress was pretty, but standing in it for eight hours in the sun was not so pretty. And it wasn't even for something I cared about, like me. It was for some random king's luncheon. The occasion? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. They just stood around all day, chatting about blah-blah stuff, like, "Oh, isn't it gorgeous outside(no)", or "That's a lovely dress you have on, Miss Cassandra!(who are you?)"

Then came the ride home. By now, I was dizzy beyond belief. But no one paid attention. They were too busy chatting some more(!). No one pays attention anymore. Until someone screamed, "My God, she's about to faint!" Then I saw black and passed out.

Never faint. If you learn nothing from this story, learn this: Whatever you do, don't faint. It sucks. It really, really, sucks. I can't even begin on how much it sucks. Okay, now back to the story.

I woke up in my bed at about 11:00 in the evening. Back then, we had to use some real clock skills to figure out what time it was. But anyway, it was 11:00 and I woke up with my nightgown on. I was sweating like a dog. You'd've thought that the night would be cooler than the day, but still….anyhow, I decided, why am I wearing this 2-layered nightgown to bed? It's a hundred degrees out! So I went hard-core and stripped down to my undergarments (hey, don't tell me you've never done this before. It's a totally normal thing). Next thing I know, I'm asleep again.

All the sudden, I hear a crashing sound. Stupid clumsy maid, I thought. I was about to go back to sleep when I hear voices. HEY, PUT THAT STRAIGHT JACKET DOWN FOR A SECOND AND LET ME TALK, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!!. Anyhow, I hear voices, and they're not in my head.

"Ragetti, shut up! You're stumblin' all over the place, we're never going to get anyone!"

Get anyone?

"Sorry, Pintel. Me eye fell out again!"

Ewwwwww……..I don't quite remember those names, so just when I'm about to get up to get my robe on to investigate, Ragetti and Pintel come storming in. While I'm standing there in my undergarments. They will not stop staring. This is getting grosser and grosser by the minute! I'm thirteen, I'm not supposed to be an object of lust yet! One of them must've noticed, because they stopped staring and took out a sword(!).

Now, I'm lucky to say this, I happen to be practicing fencing with one of the best in town. Though I don't have a sword yet, I know what he's about to do. No wait, no I don't. He comes toward me, says "Sorry, poppet", and conks me on the head. I faint again.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAMER: **I don't own POTC, Disney, or waffles. Yum.

Remember that lesson I taught you, back in Chapter 1? About never, ever fainting? Well, here's another lesson. Never, ever, ever faint two times in one day. Please, if you learn anything from this, I want you to think one thing: "I must never faint, and I must never faint two times in one day." Okay, back to the story.

I wake up (again), except this time, it's about thirty minutes later, and I'm in a dimly-lit, rat-infested, totally uncomftorble cell. It's amazing how your surroundings can change in the blink of an eye, huh? I actually have clothes on, but it's defiantly not a dress. It's men's clothing. And it smells like fish. Ewwwww…… Well, at least I have clothes, I thought. But then I thought some more. Who put this on?!? I got nightmares just thinking about it.

Just when I'm about to have a twitchy fit, a person entered the room. He had long brown hair with beads, a totally worn-out outfit, and a three-pointed brown hat. He was muttering to himself, when he stopped abruptly and stared at me. He had a look of shock on his face, and next thing I know, he's screaming "RAGETTI! PINTEL!!" Two men stumbled down the stairs. Why do they look familiar…Oh yeah, those are the guys who kidnapped me.

"Yes, Captain Sparrow?" one of them asked cautiously. "Who the frick is this?" he said while pointing to me. "Oh, that's nice." I say, but they ignore me. "Well," Ragetti (and I can tell it's him; that eye is totally fake) starts, "we're not entirely sure, but…we did 'eenie meenie mayni mo' to pick which house to kidnap from, and..." Sparrow interrupted "Eenie meenie mayni mo? What is that?!?" "It's a game we made up" Pintel replied. "So let me get this straight," Sparrow said, beginning to walk towards the two men in a menacing way, "You did tweenie, keenie, piney, ho, or whatever the hell it's called, to decide who we're kidnapping." The two men, now terrified, nodded. "I can't bloody believe this" Sparrow continued, his forehead in his hand and his head shaking. "I ask you to get me someone important, and you get me this?" He gestured toward me.

Okay, that was the last straw. "Listen up. I am Cassandra Swann, and I am a 'she', not a 'this'". Sparrow continued to shake his head in his hand. "There is no way that anyone is going to care enough about you to pay that much!"


End file.
